Humans are pretty cool, and have invented lots of things. Some of the best inventions are the most mundane. Last week I found myself searching my room for a fingernail clipper, but discovered it had disappeared within massive amounts of other stuff. When it finally again emerged, I had a moment of inspiration.
Such a simple device, yet so important. Designed by a forgotten genius, turned into a commodity, distributed globally, this little tool makes quick work of a weekly inevitability.
Making the fingernail clipper from chopped coins immortalizes it for the archaeologists of the future. I do this that they may come closer to understanding the quirks of our crazy culture. Thanks to Epoxy, it should last forever. This will be the first of many such items, which I will produce and sell on Ebay. This method of distribution ensures a widespread placement of these objects, making it more likely that various future excavations will yield evidence of these oddities. I imagine that they'll assume these were amulets for warding off evil spirits, or possibly devotional objects, commissioned as offerings to Ancient Gods. Whatever they decide, I'm glad to provide another piece of our puzzle, confusing as it may be.
My plan is, eventually, to document all Things ever created by Man within the framework of Capitalism. It is an ambitious project, and will likely take the rest of my lifetime. I will call this mission "the Genome of Stuff". Why? Why not.